Thursday, 9 January 2014

When Parents Start Comparing Their Kids.

There's this saying, "Comparison is the thief of joy" by Theodore Roosevelt, which I could not agree more. We live in a world where people like to show off, and compare their possessions with others. Not just that, people also tend to compare their kids' abilities and achievements, without even realising it.

Have you came across in a situation where people ask you:
"So how many As did your son/daughter get for his SPM?"
"Which school do you send your kids to?"
"Are you sure u want to send your kids to this and that school? I heard Sek Keb Anak-aku-pandai-dari-anak-ko is better!"
"I already enroll my 2 year old son to piano, swimming, guitar, archery lessons. How about you?"

I REALLY hate these kind of questions because to me these are some kind of means to say that "hey my kid is way better/educated than yours" or "you are a bad parent coz u don't do what I have done for my kids" sort of things. To be frank, I cant help to think how lucky some kids are because their parents can afford sending them to pre kindy or high end school and they get to learn at early stage and compare what I have done for my son. And you cant help to feel bad thinking how BAD you are for not sending your 3 year old kid to kindy like the other parents although you try to not think about it too much.

I'm the type of mom who believe that every kid is special and different, and everyone of us have our own learning pace. Some may be slow in their early years but they are the one having Doctorate or possess special/technical skills that you don't. Of course as parents we always want the best for our kids, and we would do the best we could to provide the best of things for them, no? Kids who dont go to kindy are not slow learners, nor 'underprivileged' or whatever you call it. Its their parents choice, and we should start minding our own business and think about those who are REALLY underprivileged and help the needy than to start putting our nose onto other people's life.

How I wish i can say its none of your business when people ask me "Hey your kid is already 3 years old, when are you sending him to school?" but that would be so rude of me. Let him enjoy his 'freedom' staying at home with my folks first. The time will come, sooner or later.


  1. Sokong Kak Dell. Ana memang takkan hantar Irham seawal 3 tahun to school. Walaupun Iham baru setahun 7 bulan.

    "Let him enjoy his 'freedom' staying at home with my folks first. The time will come, sooner or later."

  2. Totally in the same page with u babe. I hate people who believe they are the best compare to others & being judgemental twrds other people. Thats not the society that I want to raise my children, if I've a choice!

  3. Haha. Totally get you. Paling tak tahan dengar orang buat comparison. Selalu ingatkan diri sendiri jangan buat macam tu. Huhu.

    Totally agree with your point that children learns at their own pace.

  4. ana: kekadang kita bkn nak compare, tapi bila org dok start tanya2, surely kita tercompare secara tak sengaja. tak suka tul kalau jadi camtu

    eira: sadly thats what happening now to our society :(

    yuni: yup, kalau slow masa kecik, tak semestinya besar pun dia slow and kerja tak bagus etc. but as parents of course we'd freak out if our kids dont get good results.